mama don't let your babies grow up to be influenced by the president's socialist agenda

barry has released the text of his "back to school" speech prior to today's live classroom broadcast. the early release was intended to counter last year's outrage that many parent's expressed at having the president discuss his political agenda with their children.

that's right... parents are outraged that the president might teach their children about keynesian economics.

but here's what barry has actually come to tell them:

[...]nobody gets to write your destiny but you. Your future is in your hands. Your life is what you make of it. And nothing – absolutely nothing – is beyond your reach. So long as you’re willing to dream big. So long as you’re willing to work hard. So long as you’re willing to stay focused on your education.

sure. dream big while the walls of our underfunded institutions literally crumble around you. stay focused on your education while class sizes increase each year - while teachers are being asked to do more while being paid less - while the universities that your parents cant afford to send you to have less and less to offer you because of budget cuts...

follow the money. our country puts it's cash into afghanistan and citibank.

the university of phoenix will soon have better qualified professors than UCLA. but what will they be teaching?

the academic landscape is being infiltrated by for-profit institutions whose curriculum is determined by goldman sachs, haliburton, exxon, conoco phillips, wal-mart, etc. etc. etc.

the ancient ideal of university is quickly being replaced by balance sheets as we devolve and descend into another dark age.

but hey, barry should really just stick to the speech - the kids will figure all that other depressing stuff out for themselves soon enough.

who needs a drink?