Sunday, August 31, 2008

Hang in there New Orleans

Here on the Tallahassee end of the Gulf Coast, things are getting windy. I hope my countrymen (and women) 400 miles to the west that couldn't get out are alright tomorrow at this time.

In honor of the great fuck up that was Katrina, I post the following documentary entitled "Refuge of Last Resort" made by someone who was unable to get out last time around.

On my way out here from California, we drove through New Orleans, and there were so many destroyed structures that were never rebuilt.

Will Palin be the next American VP...

...or the next Champ Kind? You decide:

And for the record, I am still going to break my HUGE story on the dirt I got in Denver just before the start of the GOP convention, assuming it happens.

Friday, August 29, 2008

Now more than ever:

*UPDATE* We here at I.E. have been working on a mammoth, some might say, tsunami of a story. I caught wind of something in Denver and have been trailing it for the last 36 sleepless hours. To say it has consumed me is to say that Bush is dumb or that McCain has an imperfect epidermis. As McCain would say, "My friends" this is going to be enormous and might possibly change the course not just of this election, but the entire future of American lore. We will break this story sometime before the shame starts in Minnesota. Please stay tuned...

* UPDATE II*- This story is huge, perhaps the biggest story yet to break of the campaign. I will break the story sometime before the GOP convention, assuming I escape the rabbit's hole...

Palin... WTF???

So, McCane selected Sarah Palin as his running mate. Niiiiiiiiiice...

This shores-up any doubts about his judgment.

He’s chosen somebody without legitimate experience, who believes in creationism, and is currently mired in a legislative investigation.

This is good, folks.

But aside from crapping all over the wrinkled white dude and his fag-hag, I'm just in awe of the Democratic Party right now. Democrats are literally glowing, and not just the one's who grew up near Love Canal.

Seriously, I can't remember a time when the Democrats seemed this united, focused, determined, and most importantly, competent. This convention has left me optimistic. When's the last time we were optimistic about government? 1968???

Let's hope Barack and Joe are up to this final sprint. The RNC is going to be fantastic... like a train wreck.

Happy Labor Day weekend... try not to labor.

Thursday, August 28, 2008

Denver Day IV

I posted last night that love was in the mountain air after the evening's festivities, and seemingly that has carried over into today. It seems like, by and large, Sen. Clinton did her job, and that most of the PUMA/ racist Ferraro types aside, the rational majority of Clinton supporters are coming around. Tonight, Nominee Obama needs to bring them all home. There is no reason to think that he won't do this, and I am starting to see the brilliance of the way this convention was planned, and the errors of my thinking just 24 hours ago.

The Clinton and Obama war needed to end, and that took two important days, but it seems to have worked. My guess is that, assuming that Obama does tonight what he does best, that seemingly all of Clinton's open minded (and thus non-racist) supporters will account for much of Obama's post convention bounce.

Kerry, Biden, and President Clinton were all nearly perfect in their roles last night and did a lot to break apart McCain and build up Obama. The pressure is on.

I also think that McCain and the GOP's plan to try and hijack the convention spotlight by leaking out the VP selection on Obama's night is going to back fire, especially if he selects a predictable peanut turd like Mitt the Shit. Furthermore, I thought it would be bad for the GOP to have their convention so close to the Dems, for theirs starts on a holiday and those with short attention spans (ie the American electorate) will be bored with conventions after this week. Then I realized that all of this is going to help the GOP, because the more people see of them, the more it will help the Dems.

Then the National Hurricane Center projected a possible category 3 or greater to hit New Orleans right in the middle of the GOP convention. For starters, I pray to any higher power that will listen and care that the city that brought us Jazz will be spared another pending disaster. But, if my prayers are not answered, will the pending destruction highlight the little bit that has been done to improve the city in 3 years or will it serve to further drown out any attention the GOP convention gets?

Well anyway, lets hope Obama gets it right tonight. If he does, then everything else should be moot.
In other words, go Dolphins!!!

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Denver Day III

Today is my third day at the DNC, or my second day at the Clinton National Convention. I again watched the events at Andrews down the road and had tied one on pretty good by the time Sen. Clinton took the stage for what I thought was a well delivered speech. I will leave her speech alone, for more light has shined on it than perhaps is necessary. Tonight is VP night, which means Bill Clinton, who is not the VP nominee, will get all of the attention. And we wonder how Bush ever made it into office. Howard Dean, whom I greatly admire, should be fired for allowing this convention to go on the way it has under his watch. The only two moments worthy of mention thus far were speeches by Kucinich and Michelle Obama. This has been one of the greatest disappointments of my adult life. I feel like I am watching the Miami Dolphins.

At least I have a ticket for tomorrow night, so I will actually have some first hand convention floor information Thursday night.

Until then, tune everything out, this town has been turned into a garbage can by these people.

*2:29 MST UPDATE* Ok, so its only been 5 minutes since I posted, but I must tell of the experience I just had right here in the hotel lobby. A women in a pink McCain-Clinton 2008 t-shirt just walked by me. I wanted to throw a chair at her, but I don't have the strength. Not to imply that my spirit is broken...rather, these are rather heavy though comfortable) chairs here at the Hyatt. I am heading out in a few. More soon either from me or I will call into my wife who will post for me on my behalf.

Speaking of which, I have no recollection of any run in with the Gov of Pennsylvania. However, I do see evidence from my text messages that I sent last night that something happened with him and I, or at least, and more likely, someone I thought was him...

*UPDATE 9:27 MST*- I take back what I said. Love is in the mountain air. The Olympic hangover is over! Obama is Phelps. More tomorrow...

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Blog Me A River...

Due to mental burnout and a slew of other "problems" with reality I am going to be "away" for sometime from the blogosphere. I want to say thank you to ALL my blogobuddys and those who have decided to take a moment of their precious time to come and read this sad attempt at a blog. I won't name names because I am sure I will offend some by leaving them out accidentally so you know who you are and you are bad asses! Keep fighting the good fight! I will still periodically check to see how things are with all of you. Once again, I really appreciate all of you who I got to "know" over the past few months and hope to one day return anew! I leave you with a song and a request:

"You can be my head, cause I've ruined this one, rotting hole where it, used to be!"


Denver: Day II

It is a picture perfect day here in the mountains. I am still hoping to get Kreplech and Bradda out here. Come on guys, you can still catch the last 2 days!

I am going to stop referring to this as Obama's convention, because this convention, at least until now, has been defined by the Hillary holes that are now handing out fliers claiming the Obama is a Muslim and cheered on 9/11. I am really starting to think they are moles for the McCain camp.

Tonight should be interesting. I imagine someone as bright and professional as Sen. Clinton will hit a home run and shut up this small margin of her faithful, but I am not so sure. I am going to try and check out K.O. and the other MSNBC folk so look for me in the background. I will have the brown paper bag with the Tecate in it (gotta love Costco!) and the Miami Dolphins hat. My guess is I will not be the only one drinking the former, but will clearly be the only one wearing the later.

By the way, speaking of Costco, did anyone else notice that the guys arrested for plotting to kill Obama look like one of the extras in Idiocracy?

* 3:45 MST UPDATE *
If you have seen the film Independence Day, please recall the scene where the lunatics stand on top of the building holding signs to greet the alien visitors. That was the scene where I began rooting for the dudes in the black ships, and these are the folks that have taken over Denver. The crowd outside is more of the Ron Paul, fringe Hillary hole, world is flat because it looks that way at the beach sort of crowd. I need Thorazine.

I am trying to get inside, but my shot at credentials might have been blown by a bad experience at the pool, that got me in trouble with a delegate from West Virginia that flat out told me that a "Negro will never get my people's support.," when I threw her sun hat into the pool. She took my photo and said she was alerting the authorities.

8pm east coast update: sal just called me and said i made me swear that i would post something about him and ed rendell. so i did. i couldn't make out much more than that.

Monday, August 25, 2008

Live from Andrew's Pub in Denver

Michelle hit a home run. As my wife posted on my behalf, I was unable to get in tonight. Security got me and I have been watching from a pub down the road from the arena. I only have a second, for I am using some K-Street pole's laptop and I'm in no condition to type, but Michelle is a spectacular human, and these Hillary holes are scum. More tomorrow...

Tribute to the Shogun of Harlem

Day One in Denver

There are professional Dems everywhere. It like being in San Francisco's city hall, only it smells worse. I am still trying to get my creds for tonight. I saw Nanci Pelosi in the elevator at the Hyatt and asked her but she turned me down and a tall man in a dark suit gave me the impression I should ask no further questions. I was in a bathing suit and had a can of Tecate in my hand after all...I wanted to ask if there would be a Sho'nuff tribute tonight, but I was too frightened. More soon.

*UPDATE* 3:06 PM MST- the big story so far today are and conservative Supreme Court loving stiffs known as P.U.M.A. (see turd of the hour). I had a professed feminist and Hillary Clinton supporter tell me outright that she would "Rather give Roberts her eggs than vote for that prick Obama." I told her she should never have vaginal sex again and should be well practiced in sodomy if McCain wins and she told me she was already on it. So at least scum like this are preparing for the worst.

The Hillary people are everywhere and they seem to have a blind lust for war, death, anit-abortion laws, moonpies and the Republican Party.

I am looking everywhere for the lord of the paste eaters, ie, Mark Penn, but he is probably hitchhiking to St. Paul to be with the Republicans he has been working to elect since January.

My friends (as McCain would say) all I can tell you is we are doomed, and its the Clinton's fault. President McCain is going to get us all killed, and its her and Bill's fault. This is going to be an ugly, depressing, and vengeful few days. My advice, buy stock in firms that produce bomb shelters. If these folk have their way, it will be a safe buy.

UPDATE: 4:26 MST- No, she does not seem to like cheap beer imported south of the border...but the good news is that I met a disgruntled Berklee College of Music (Boston) grad the works the lights and claims he can get me in as part of the sound crew. This would require false documentation and I am not sure what is more important-- avoiding a felony or a better coverage for i.e.?!?

The Clinton people are worse than I am reporting. I can think of at least 4 dozen venereal diseases I would prefer to them.

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Weekend Comedy

Classic Borat:

We will be blogging all this week live from Denver. I depart in 4 min...

Saturday, August 23, 2008

A Weekend Video for Randal Graves

This answers your last question:

Yes, it is sad that you knew about his solo record...but not as sad as me remembering this video.

Top 6 things less interesting than John McCain

Earlier today I paid a visit to the great site devoted to things younger than McCain. Since it is Saturday and I am stuck inside during a tropical storm, I thought I would post something nice about the senior Senator from Arizona-- ie, things more dull than John McCain. The guy is a snoozer, but the things I am going to list are, in my opinion, even more boring than the presumptive Republican nominee. Feel free to ad your own, if you can stay awake that long. Make no mistake, this is a very tough assignment, probably even more difficult than that terrible hour I spent watching Fox news last month. After all, what could really be less interesting than John McCain??? I tried making this a top 10 list, but I could only come up with six things.

But first, I leave you with a thought: Someone born the day John McCain was AARP eligible is now old enough to drink in all 50 states.

Ok, now that that's out of the way, here are some pretty boring things:

6) The pet rock

I was on the fence about this one. I mean, it is a pet and it is a rock, so at the very least it serves two purposes and McCain only serves one. But I have to think McCain is more interesting than a rock inside a box....right?

5) Andrew Ridgely

Yes, the other guy from Wham. What the hell is up with this guy? He added nothing to the duo and really held George back. I think it is safe to say he is less interesting than John McCain. At least McCain has all those scars to go along with his creepy personality. What does Andy bring to the table?

4) Wendy's

I don't eat fast food, but I used to all the time, and I never liked this place. It tries to be a healthier alternative to McDonalds or BK, but who really buys into that? And what kid get excited about going to Wendy's? Find me a kid who likes those stupid square burgers and I'll show you a McCain supporter that isn't a genocidal racist....Not gonna happen.

3) Cleaning

Cleaning is no fun, at least not for me. I have heard McCain speak, and as bad as it is, I would still rather watch him on the tube than I would mop the floor or wipe a bath tub. At least, if you have the means, you can hire a cleaning person. Maybe I can hire someone to watch the RNC for me next week....

2) The 4th Grade

This is the year that a kid has really got to buckle down and get the academic house in order, or else you may not get into the upper level math classes in middle school a few years down the line, and the rest of your schooling will center upon learning how to write checks and lick stamps. The entire grade is lousy, and far less interesting than McCain.

1) Cindy McCain

As I have stated in previous posts, she is the product of Hitler's most talented taxidermist and as dull as her husband is, she is far worse. I can't even imagine what an evening might be like in one of their seven homes. Do they even try to communicate? I just get the sense that they spend all their time looking at fine China and robust Greek boys performing feats of strength in their garden.


I was wrong, its Joe. Good, safe pick. Lets face it, the dude is white and oldish, and knows a ton about foreign policy. In other words, he takes away the only three reasons people have to vote for McCain.

As far as McCain is concerned, I have a good source inside his campaign that claims he is in Argentina right now looking at several old Nazi officers to be his VP. More on that as events unfold...

Friday, August 22, 2008

Quick Thoughts on the Obama VP Process

I will keep this short for this is a very saturated topic on the Internets. I will predict right now that it is not going to be Biden. I like Joe and wouldn't mind him as the choice, its just my gut that they are putting us on the wrong path right now to maximize the impact of the announcement. I also think that picking Joe would be an admission that Obama is weak of foreign policy, and I don't think Obama thinks he is weak there, and I also think he is right about that.

I have no idea who he is going to pick, but if I had to guess, it will be Kaine from Virginia.

But enough of the chit chat, here is some classic Woody Allen from the film Bananas. My favorite part occurs 3:36 seconds in:

Thursday, August 21, 2008

McCain does not know how many houses he owns...

This is a man that is going to be in touch with the average American? He literally has to rely on his staff to account for all of he and his taxidermied Aryan's homes. Either he is too old or too rich to remember or care. Sure, this is something all those racist blue collar workers that are going to vote for him anyway so they can become permanently crippled economically and spiritually can relate too....


Anyone that makes under a million U.S.D. a year that votes for McCain will get what they deserve. Hell, anyone that does so should get a free flight to Nairobi to live with Obama's brother for a month so they can see if they like shanty living, because 4 more years of this, and that's how most of us will be living, if there is any cellular life remaining.

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Late Night Video...

A really awesome video in honor of Fleet Week in San Fransisco. They did a pretty damn good job with this one in my humble opinion. How cool were the Imperial Walkers on the beach?

Sen. Obama's half-brother is "found" in Kenya

The Italian version of Vanity Fair purports in its latest edition to have tracked down brother George living in obscurity in a hut in the shanty town of Huruma on the outskirts of Nairobi, Kenya, surviving on less than a dollar a month:

He will not, in other words, be by his brother's side in Colorado enjoying reflected adulation. "No one knows who I am," he told the magazine, saying he is too embarrassed to admit to anyone that the man running for the White House in America is his half-brother because of his abject penury. "If anyone says something about my surname, I say we are not related. I am ashamed."

OK, lets get it out of the way, as the photo above bares, he does look a bit like the Tyrone-- the crack head character from Dave Chapelle's show.

To me, the two most newsworthy aspects of this story is how the Right is going to try (as they have already started) and turn this into an anti-Obama story. That is predicable and, sadly,going to be predictably effective.

What has not really been mentioned is the reality that "slum" dwellers in Africa (and other parts of the developing world) actually subsist on $12 USD a year. That is insane. I have seen people spend more on that for a single coffee in this country, even while we are in the midst of an economic downturn.

We often discuss (correctly) the economic disparity in the USA, but this is completely out of whack, and something we must focus our energies on, if not for our humanity, then for our physical safety, as this is fertile soil for those that wish to recruit agents to commit political violence against the West.

Since the Right frames seemingly every argument this way, we should take a page from there book, because, sadly, it almost always works.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Holy "See You Next Time!"- Shepard Smith drops the "C" word on the air!!!

I for one am outraged and demand he be fired.... I must now wash my ears out with soap-- and I'm not so sure that will even work. I may just have to kill myself in hopes of cleansing my delicate and shattered soul.

In lesser news, the national debt (counted on the right) has broken the $9.6 trillion threshold!

Monday, August 18, 2008

Special Comment...

Tonight Keith Olberman had a special comment for John McCain tonight. It's too good to explain so I urge everyone who hasn't seen it to view it and let us know what you thought.

Late Night Video...

The Real McCain. Watch the new Brave New Films video and tell me, whose the elitist again?

No More "Forums" Barack!

On Saturday Barack Obama and John McCain held a presidential forum at the Saddleback Church in CA., which is an evangelical church. At first,I was pretty excited to watch because McCain has been shoving his foot in his mouth lately and I thought he would continue the trend. Alas, in my opinion, he wiped the floor with Obama. I should have seen it coming a mile away but it didn't hit me till after the "show".

Of course McCain came away looking all Reaganesque! It's a freaking evangelical church! Why the fuck would Obama agree to this madness? I understand he was trying to give them a chance to get to know him but I think this "forum" was the wrong way to do it. Obama went into the lion's den and got mauled by an old Muppet. You can be sure that McCain will NOT be engaging Obama in ANY kind of "forums" where the crowd will be 75% pro-Obama like it was Sat. for McCain at the church (Debate at NYU?).

Sure, Barack seemed comfortable and his answers definitely seemed honest and sincere. McCain on the other hand answered quickly and then would use the rest of the time to stump about "issues" he felt would rile up his base. I grew more agitated by the minute every time McCain would start telling stories that had little to do with the question then I remembered that the pastor is certainly a McCain voter and this whole "forum" was set up to make the old fart look good. This had nothing to do with "faith" or God, it was simply a bunch of white evangelicals listening to their man. One guy was wearing a fucking American flag button down shirt for God sake! Classy!

When asked who they would listen to if they won the White House, Obama said Michelle and McCain said Gen. Petraus. When asked what they would do about evil (after the pastor asked if evil was REAL no less), Barack said he'd contain it and McCain? Well, he'd defeat it of course! Obama told stories of his grandmother and his desire to help the poor. McCain told a detailed story about the torture he endured (I thought he said he wasn't going to talk about his POW days!??) and how we need to drill offshore right away. McCain mentioned Reagan multiple times but never Jesus. In sum, McCain came across as the swaggering tough-guy Republican who will defeat bad guys the world over. Barack Obama came across as an intellectual do-gooder who wants to raise your taxes.

This is the same bullshit we've be getting force-fed for the last 15 years or so. In real life, Republicans are macho men who will protect you and have the moral values to lead (I guess dumping your crippled wife for a new, sexier model is morally OK!). Democrats are the effeminate nerds who seem to speak down to people and they all have dominant wives. The media feeds us this gruel nightly. This is why I don't understand what Obama was thinking going into this setting. It only furthered these fake images. I was wondering when Brit Hume was going to jump out from behind the stage, AHA we got you to come on Fox finally!

So my man Obama, do us all a favor! Do not fall into the traps that Gore and Kerry fell into( I KNOW Kerry was a shitty candidate Puddy, that's not the point!). You must begin to fight for this honor to be called TPOTUS. McCain and the lunatic fringe is not going to hand it to you! When you said recently that it almost seems like the Republicans take pride in being ignorant, well that is what I'm talking about! We need more of THAT guy and not the guy I saw on Saturday.

Here's Mr. Moore's guide on how to lose this gimme putt that is an election Mr. Obama. This should be mandatory reading.

Friday, August 15, 2008

RE: Gas Prices

I was going to post this as a poll question, but I thought it might require some elaboration. As many of you are probably aware, gas prices are on the decline from record highs. Do any of you think that the price grocery and flight prices will decline, since their rise, for the most part, was blamed on gas prices?

For me, the answer is no, but I would love to know what your experiences have been these last few weeks before I make another bitter judgment against the cooperate structure.

My assumption is that companies will do the exact same thing the government does when they make a tax for a specific purpose and that purpose goes away. But I may be wrong...

Randy Newman: A Few Words in Defense of Our Country

This is great stuff...enjoy:

Thursday, August 14, 2008


God Loves Comedy Gold...

I DARE you all to watch this and not piss your pants in hysterics! Way too many horrible things have been going down lately. We all need a good laugh...

Bush, McCain, and the rest of the GOP sheep rape and plunder the world.

The sheep go along with mass murder for personal gain, stupidity, or both. The prolife hypocrisy not only supports but perpetuates mass murder of those that have left the comfort of the womb. Pursuit of personal riches has become the norm as democracy has been eroded. Our leaders preach for human rights around the world as they commit the most horrific acts ever.

Where did the oil go?

We invaded Iraq for their wealth of oil. Such a supply should have brought our prices down. How come they have risen more in the last eight years then ever before? We have been told that the oil supply has dwindled so much in the last eight years that now our all mighty leader has lifted sanctions on drilling in our off-shore wild life sanctuaries. Might it have anything to do with oil companies running our government? Remember when the idea of the democratic government was to look out for the citizens? Yeah, I barely remember either. The evolution of the free market society continues to merge the private and public sectors into one beast. It was the natural course. It had to happen this way. The goal of the corporation is to make money. Corporate boards must make decisions to maximize revenues. Nothing else matters. So, the oil companies continue to report record profits every quarter while our economy drowns. We were bamboozled into going to war with Iraq and now they are doing it to us again by proposing to rape our sovereign lands. What will the collateral damage be? Who benefits from such actions? How long will the benefits last? Will the pros even come close to the cons? How can people believe McCain’s energy policy intentions?

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

John McCain Will Not Be Happy Unless We All Die

John McCain wants us all dead. How else can one explain his fanatical declaration that he wants to restart the cold war with Russia? In his mind, his hero Ronny ended the Cold War, and he wants to start it back up.

Granted, Russia was far too heavy handed in its response to Georgia, but, as our resident Commie sympathizer Hanoi Jake pointed out earlier, they were very much provoked by Georgia and the actions of the West.

Now McCain wants us to isolate Russia, which of course is the very sort of policy path that got us here. We need to engage Russia, and Sec. Rice, who made a living off of the Cold War, and McCains of her elk have a blood lust for war with Russia, Islam, and humanity itself.

Obama should simply run ads between now and November that state "McCain will not rest until you and those you love are either dead, broke or both. George Bush started this policy, and McCain intends to finish it. I'm Barack Obama and I approve this message because I don't want to kill you."

Even the racist scum that would never vote for a black man would have to when its laid on the line like that, right?

Hell, in places like West Virginia we could take both names off the ballot and just ask voters to answer the following question: Would you rather get killed by an old white guy or prosper under the leadership of a black president?

Would the Electoral College polls look any different if it were spread that way?

In my opinion, if McCain wins, he will spare the super wealthy, at least at first. Then he will put high dosages of Clomiphene citrate in the water supply so that he can quickly repopulate whats left of our once proud species. Then, on his one-hundredth birthday (3 years from now), he will set off some cryptic doomsday device (a gift from Cheney) and go off to the next life in flames.

Ozzy was right, there is no rest for the wicked...

And thus, I offer the following mantra, to be repeated daily in conjunction with your exercises:

A vote for McCain is a vote for death!
A vote for McCain is a vote for Abba!
A vote for McCain is Suicide!
Don't vote McCain- Racism Kills!

Say it 10 times fast.

adiós mamones...

Wear Your News

CNN is apparently in the apparel business. You can now buy CNN headlines printed on t-shirts.

My personal favorite: "What is this hairless, big-nosed beast?" The headline at the top of the page even links to the article. In this case it happens to be a story about the mythical, goat-sucking chupucabra (which I still contend might be an ex-girlfriend of mine).

CNN might put American Apparel out of business if hipsters realize the dark irony of wearing bad news. I'm waiting for a shirt that says, "24-Hour news organization distracts bored readers with cheap Chinese-made clothing".

What news would you wear?

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Candidates Top Ten Songs...

Blender asked the candidates what their top ten songs of all time are. They then had Randy Newman and Girl Talk(?) to analyze the picks. It's kind of stupid I think because it has no bearing on anything when it comes to leading our nation out of the shitter but I'm posting it because one of Randy Newman's remarks made me spit water on my cat. Here's the lists:

1. Ready or Not Fugees
2. What's Going On Marvin Gaye
3. I'm On Fire Bruce Spingsteen
4. Gimme Shelter Rolling Stones
5. Sinnerman Nina Simone
6. Touch the Sky Kanye West
7. You'd Be So Easy to Love Frank Sinatra
8. Think Aretha Franklin
9. City of Blinding Lights U2
10. Yes We Can

1. Dancing Queen ABBA
2. Blue Bayou Roy Orbison
3. Take a Chance On Me ABBA
4. If We MakeIt Through December Merle Haggard
5. As Time Goes By Dooley Wilson
6. Good Vibrations The Beach Boys
7. What A Wonderful World Louis Armstrong
8. I've Got You Under My Skin Frank Sinatra
9. Sweet Caroline Neil Diamond
10. Smoke Gets In Your Eyes The Platters

Now here's Randy Newman responding to the question, "Who gets your vote based on these lists?":

RN: McCain has a really likable list. Then again, Hitler liked some good music, you know?

I couldn't have said it better myself! BTW, who the fuck puts ABBA's "Take a Chance on Me" on their top ten songs of all time?? And where the hell are the Beatles?

uhm... Happy Belated Birthday Bradda

Happy belated birthday to our resident cranky-old-fucker, Bradda. The real deal was this past Sunday... but we're a little slow here at IE.

Everybody be sure to wish the bastard a good one (retrospectively, of course)... and send him all your whiskey.

Monday, August 11, 2008

The Cold War is Back!!!

Its looking more and more like we are going back in time! I have posted the folloiwng clip from Dr. Strangelove in honor of the momentous occurance in the history of humankind:

A Few Odds and Ends

I am still adjusting to being back on the East Coast and am keeping some very bizarre hours these days. Thus, I offer a few tidbits on some things I have been reading about:

- Looks like Obama could win Florida and still not get the state's 27 electoral votes. This is serious and should not be taken lightly. We need to get our acts together so we don't wake up on Nov. 5th wondering how something like this happened.

-It turns out that McCain thinks Putin is still the president of Russia:

"I would be very direct with President Putin that these actions will have consequences long term, in terms of our relationship with Russia, and it is in violation of the norms of international conduct," he said in an interview with The Associated Press in Las Vegas.

I had not heard of this McCain in the mouth moment until this morning and I am still amazed that nobody cares that the one thing he has most in common with the sitting U.S. President is a distinct slowness of the mind. I guess a story about McCain having a mishap about a war nobody cares about is not big news.

- Did anyone see Bob Costas interview Bush last night? This is the second time I have witnessed these two chat and I think Bush is scared of him, as he should be, for the intelligence gap between the two is painstakingly visible, depressing and frightening. Bob is better with the soft gloves he has to wear in his professional role than most in the political press are bare fisted. Which leads me to think that his intellect is wasted on sports and that he should be offered the Meet the Press job. If he focused on the more important games of the body politic, I think he could use his skills constructively for good instead of entertainment.

- Better savor that Team U.S.A. thrashing in basketball yesterday, for China is about to officially become more productive than the United States.

- Iraq is getting more and more insistent that the U.S. set a timeline for withdrawal. Again, I am not hearing much about this.

Speaking of Iraq, they have just signed a 1.2 billion dollar oil deal with China. Isn't that supposed to be our blood oil?

Furthermore, the country's violence is picking up again.

Lastly, I began watching HBO's Baghdad High last night and think its incredible. Thanks for the heads up Bradda...

Saturday, August 9, 2008

The Predictions of Supersymmetric Particle Models: Sentiments on Dark Matter in the 21st Century and the 2008 NFL Season ~ Part IV

So what are they really doing? I'm no physicist (if I were, I'd know that heavy ion physics is more practical in theory, but not as applicable as what is going down at the LHC) ...but I'm told it all has something to do with gluons and quarks. A quark is a generic type of physical particle that interacts via the strong force and that forms one of the two basic constituents of matter, the other being the lepton. Quarks come in different flavors which are assigned a baryon number, an internal property which differentiates quarks from leptons. They are also assigned a vanishing lepton number which represents the number of leptons minus the number of antileptons. Quarks have a spin too, but we'll get to that later. Leptons are sub atomic particles composed of the electron, the muon and the tauon (or tau particle). In particle physics the strong force (a. k. a. ~ strong interaction or color force) as well as their associated neutrinos (electron neutrino, muon neutrino, and tau neutrino) holds quarks and gluons together to form protons and neutrons. Gluons are the elementary particles that cause quarks to interact and are indirectly responsible for binding protons and neutrons together in atomic nuclei. But every so often you get a strange quark. This is a second generation quark with a strangeness of -1, like Napoleon Bonaparte. A strangelet is a hypothetical object consisting of a bound state of roughly equal numbers of up, down and strange quarks. The perceived dangers in the worldwide hunt for dark matter directly reference strangelets and how they might convert all the atoms of all the nuclei on the Earth into a mass of strange matter.

AFC Ouest

San Diegeau Éclairs 12-4 LaDainian Tomlinson took a lot of criticism for standing on the sidelines during the AFC Championship. It's bullshit and it will not deter 90% of fantasy owners with the #1 pick from selecting him. When he is on, his game is silkier than an MC Solaar rhyme. If WR Chris Chambers could get to a Pro Bowl under Nick Saban with Gus Frerrote at QB, I have to imagine, he'll play at least close to that level as he should be fully acquainted with this offense. CB Antonio Cromartie should unleash his own Reign of Terror on most QBs he faces. Norv has no excuses (now that referee Gerry Austin is retired) with Ted Cotrell running this defense.

Denveur Bronceaux 7-9 Mike Shanahan is burning through running backs like a Parisien does cigarettes. If RB Selvin Young isn't the answer, QB Jay Cutler could resemble Jean Moulin trying to quickly mobilize his new crop of WRs while Brandon Marshall learns to act like someone who has advanced beyond La Petite Academy. LB Boss Bailey will play along brother, CB Champ Bailey for the first time on the same NFL roster. The defense also gets a boost as safeties Marlon McCree and Marquand Manuel come in (at the expense of 15 year veteran John Lynch) to beef up an already potent secondary. I believe that rookie OT Ryan Clady has what it takes to play as big as André René Roussimoff.

Oakterre Agresseurs 5-11 Owner Al Davis is to Raiders fans what Louis Vuitton is to French Jews. Since their Super Bowl run this team compiled an NFL-worst 19-61 record. Former #1 pick QB JaMarcus Russell earned millions last year and barely even had to speak to the media. He has a lot more to answer for now. Rookie phenom RB Darren McFadden may have the coolest nickname ever and will attempt to be the big play threat for this offense. Free agent DeAngelo Hall will line up opposite Nnamdi Asomugha to form arguably the best CB tandem in the league. LB Thomas Howard is a beast and should have gone to the Pro Bowl last season. Davis' open criticism of head coach, Lane Kiffin, does enough to sustain this period of instability and will ultimately lead the team to collapse like Jean Van de Velde in the '99 British Open.

Kansas City Chefs 4-10 Brodie Croyle? Really? To Herm Edwards it is as logical in principle as the Maginot Line. It's not the first time I've questioned Herm. He's as perplexing as a Marcel Marceau performance. Second year WR Dwayne Bowe was 5 yards shy of 1000 yards last season and provides a passing threat that guys like Marc Boerigter and Samie Parker didn't. Three rookies have been penciled in as starters, most notably DT Glenn Dorsey. Chan Gailey makes a return to the NFL to resuscitate an offense that ranked last in most categories. A lot will rest on the shoulders of RB Larry Johnson and how well his line blocks for him. Just in case, Herm has his video resume updated.

Friday, August 8, 2008

Dazed And Confused...

TPM has put together all of McLame's recent "special" moments in a new video. It's scary to think this man has a chance to run our once great nation. If this old bastard somehow wins in Nov. we can kiss this American experiment goodbye just like Sal said in his post earlier.

John Edwards and his Tale of Tail

Well, it turns out that John Edwards lied about dipping his noodle in some forbidden sauce. The National Enquirer has been on this story for at least a year, and recently reported that his seed was responsible for the baby in the photo above.

I was pretty fond of the "new" John Edwards that ran for president in 2008. I very well may have voted for him if he had not dropped out of the race by the time the votes were being cast in California. However, since he is now admitting that this all took place back in 2006, I have to wonder what, if anything, he was thinking? What made him think this would not come out? Imagine if this was going on while he was the Democratic nominee? It would be almost as scandalous as Obama being black and wanting to blow up government buildings because of his middle name, as Hannity suggests-- or wanting to set up death camps for Jews and Gypsies, as Joe Lieberman exclaims-- or that he wants to declare war on rural America by teaching evolution and literacy, as Rush Big Pants portrays.

But I digress, like Edwards has. I can't believe that a man who ran as a strong family man through some of the most trying of circumstances would have tried to pull this off. I am very glad he is not the nominee right now, and that Obama never selected him to be his V.P. And to make matters worse, that glossy little bastard wants to speak at the party's convention. To be safe, the Dem should banish him and seal the borders of Colorado as to prevent anyone with a southern accent from entering the state during the convention, or else suffer the consequences.

Please allow me to point out that being faithful to ones spouse has no direct barring on one's ability to govern-- Kennedy and Clinton both effectively demonstrated that. However, it does eat into ones political capital, whether it should or shouldn't, and certainly would be problematic in our nations national struggle against the disease known as McCainology.

In sum, him running with this kind of baggage speaks volumes about the enormity of his ego and the minute of concern he holds for his party or country.

Hey John, see you at the Spearmint Rhino, sucka...

Glen Beck is a shit-eating feltcher...

It's true! Idiot-boy the self-celebratory ex-alcholic (seriously, the douchebag mentions his past vice everytime he opens the asshole on his face that he uses as a mouth) drew a comparison between Obama's call to properly inflate tires and driving wihtout clothes on to "decrease the weight of our cars, which would increase our gas mileage so dramatically that we probably wouldn't have to drill for any new oil..."

Clearly Beck's found humor in that microscopic, dinosaur-esque, puny, pathetic, republican-shill-of-a-hack little brain of his.

Fuck-stain goes on to say:

It turns out that about two-thirds of vehicles already have properly inflated tires. That means we'd likely save somewhere around 800,000 barrels of oil a day if everyone else also complied. Meanwhile, the U.S. Minerals Management Service estimates that there are about 86 billion barrels of oil in the areas that we're not allowed to drill. You do the math.

NO!!!! You do the fucking math you brainless, bloated corpse! 800,000 motherfucking barrels a day immediately compared to some hypothetical reserve cashing in decades from now!

Relate Obama's tire pressure remark to Carter's sweater nonsense all you want (given Obama's not asking anybody to sacrifice a fucking thing) but at some point even moronic "news" DJs are going to have to admit that Obama and Carter are right.

Glen: give your paycheck to Smith & Wesson, buy a gun, and shoot off that tiny flacid dick of yours to put an end to your diseased genealogy. We have enough distractions without your stupidity.

This is why I rarely post... see ya next month. Peace.


Texas: America's Anchor

Why is Texas slaughtering foreign nationals like cattle? Why does the state of Texas violate international law and so few inside this ill country's borders seem to know or care about it? The answer to me is simple-- the American experiment has failed.

Or has it? Perhaps this is how it is supposed to work.? (I am not sure if that is a question or a statement)

I have insomnia and bitter memories of the country I just saw, and I am deeply saddened that the state I spent 900 miles driving through last week has declared jihad on the very idea of humanity itself.

So I have placed a new poll question on the right. Please let us know what you think...or just go buy a candy bar and salute the flag, whichever you prefer.

And remember, if you watch the Olympics, root for the Federated States of Micronesia-- they need the support.

Go team!!!

Thursday, August 7, 2008

Random Thursday...Upchuck Of Infotainment

"Bush forged documents?!? No way!"

For the love of Pete will someone at MSNBC give this woman a SHOW!

Kreplech..err..Puddy has been in the bathroom all night after hearing THIS! (I'm washing my face Mom!)

What the fuck is going on with Canada's BUSES?!?

Remember people, when waiting for a pot delivery always lock up your DOGS! (Fucking Cops are out of control!)

This is for dcup! Imagine your drive home in the heat in one of THESE! (I call dibs on the B.P. banana hammock!)

There's no way that the Dems could blow this election, is THERE??

PETA's response to last Thursday's bus story. Umm...I'm failing to make the connection.

Hey guys and gals, party at my place this weekend. Beer and electric grilled steaks for everyone!

Following the yellow brick road to the White House. How did they GET HERE?

Did the NSA give them a few HINTS? (At least they don't have to deal with that pesky ACLU!)

Someone is going to be throwing one hell of a PARTY!

Baghdad High...

For those who have HBO, I highly recommend checking out the documentary they are running called "Baghdad High". It follows four Iraqi teenagers through their final year in school and the trials and tribulations of living in Baghdad as a young Iraqi. The four boys all have different religious backgrounds(Kurd, Sunni, Shia, and Christian) and all attend the same school in Baghdad. They were given cameras and the movie is basically a vlog of their daily lives during the school year. What results is amazingly similar to what you'd expect from giving four American teenagers a camera for a year. They pine over girls, crank the music, argue with their Moms(gasp!), worry over upcoming exams in school, and oh yeah, goof off like crazy terrorists teenagers. My better half and I came away thinking if only this kind of movie could have a huge opening like "The Dark Knight". I truly believe that if more of the pro-war/anti-Arab citizens in this country could see that the kids in this movie could easily be their own, maybe they'd think twice about war and the politicians they vote to "protect" them by starting wars.

Wednesday, August 6, 2008


Apparently not all of us are getting hit hard by the economy. A lady in California shelled out $50,000 to the Seoul National University to give her five identically cloned copies of her beloved pit bull Booger. We are officially entering strange times people. Buckle up!

I had to do it:

Lewis: [planning the party] Do any of you have dates, besides Gilbert?
Lamar Latrell, Tri-Lam: I do!
Booger: Yeah, but that's with a guy.
Lewis: Well, what about you, Booger?
Booger: I've been combing the High Schools all day!

Hands Across America(With Briefcases Full Of Cash!)

HelenWheels just turned me on to a great new site that lists all of the wrinkly white-haired guy's lobbying ties. A very interactive and informative site to say the least. Now, how do we make this into a massive chain email that is sent throughout Nebraska? Who am I kidding, no one lives in Nebraska!

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Paris Hilton Ad:

I am putting this up here only because she refers to McCain as a "wrinkly white haired dude".

See more Paris Hilton videos at Funny or Die

Carry on....

Disjointed Thoughts and the Diseased American Spirit

Spreading the disease/
Everybody needs
But no one wants to see/
The way society
Keeps spreading the disease

- Queensryche

Times are tough when you have no choice but to quote Queensryche, but we are where we are. Nothing works well in this country. Please name me one thing that functions as it should? One institution, one entity...I dare you.

Arsenio Hall in Amazon Women on the Moon

- Why do the worst Americans that represent the country's worst aspects love the place so damn much?

- Anyone that says the private sector is more efficient than the public sector is, from this point onward, an absolute idiot. One could only effectively argue that both are indeed inefficient. If you think the private sector is efficient, please see: Delta Airlines, LA Quinta Inn, Quality Inn, any moving company, U.S. Airways, any cable television company, American Airlines, any credit card company that has you on hold, the music industry, any HMO and, for good measure, the Olive Garden, just because they suck so dadgum much.

- Here is a good HST quote: "In a nation ruled by swine, all pigs are upwardly mobile—and the rest of us are fucked until we can put our acts together: not necessarily to win, but mainly to keep from losing completely. We owe that to ourselves and our crippled self-image as something better than a nation of panicked sheep."
The Great Shark Hunt, 1979

- LOOK! Today's rain turned the pigs dirt into mud! Rejoice now, for another drought begins tomorrow.

- The U.S.A. is over. This is not news. But I cannot escape my newly founded (and hopefully temporary) opinion that George W. Bush is the president we deserve, and that we should just get it over with and make him king. He is our most genuine and realistic ambassador to the planet Earth.

- In case you haven't figured it out, I have been waiting on the cable guy for 9 hours. He came once and got the Internet to work, but the TV is dead and remains dead, and this is getting worse every moment I am on hold.

- The very possibility of this fence with Mexico is wrong on more levels than my brain can grasp in my current condition. I am now for open borders. Kreplech was right all along...and Puddy is a fad.

This is going to be somewhat of a running thread. More soon...

Monday, August 4, 2008

People With Way Too Much Time On Their Hands!

Amazing synching on this video. This is for Puddy, who was unhappy with his name. No more Kreplech....your moving on UP!

Saturday, August 2, 2008

An Strange Moment in San Antonio

Every moment spent in Texas is strange, but some are more bizarre then others. Walking back to my hotel in San Antonio tonight, my wife and I came across the bus featured above. Her being from Boston, and thus being rightfully contemptuous of all things Texan, she was about to give the bus the bird. But I calmed her down and explained my theory that whoever, or whatever was behind it, was somehow on our side. Check out this site for more.

On a side note, we have gone roughly 1,300 miles, and so far we have seen only 4 bumper stickers in favor of Obama (one that stated-- Tejanos for Obama), and one against (stating NO-bama) and no McCain stickers at all.

Friday, August 1, 2008

Is anyone here from Arizona?

If so-- how do you live here? Its 8:30 in the morning and its already 647 degrees Celsius. I think that's over a trillion degrees Fahrenheit. If the good lord wanted Jews like me to live in the desert, he/she would have put our homeland in the desert...Well, forget that last part, but its really, really hot. I think I would rather have my dog relive her bowels in my car then have to stand out there for one minute more than is necessary. Not only that, but I think everyone here is armed and is trying to kill us. If they are not, they should be for the terrible things I am thinking about them. And we're not even in Texas yet.

We will be in El Paso tonight, which I think might be cool, because its almost entirely comprised of Mexicans and Central Americans. The only Texans I have beef with are the wild eyed cowboys that think murder is compassion and white makes right. Ya know, the kind that utter barley legible phrases such as: Bush a good man but he just wunt, ya know, conserv-tive nuff cause we shoulda just go down and blow up damn Mex-co ta pieces.

Please note: never travel with animals. Make them find their own way. I love my dog, and I even like the wife's cat, but next time, they find their own ride. They are slowing us down. I could zip through Texas quickly if it wasn't for them and their inability to cope with extreme heat, need to eat and relief of previously eaten and drank food and water.

Anyhow, I may have WiFi in El Paso, or I may not. I do know they have a casino, and if they have A.C., I will be making a fortune. Half of all profits will go toward the Free Dr. Monkey drive.

Stay classy everyone, now more than ever...

Free Dr. Monkey!

Go visit our friend Dr. Monkey VonMonkerstein HERE! His site is in limbo due to some complaint. His site rules and it's bullshit that he's been censored. Show my man some love! This is bullshit...