Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Boo Fucking Hoo

If you think this guy looks smart, you're wrong. He is a complete moron. His name is Adolf Merckle. He was born into money and expanded his family empire by transforming his grandfather's chemical company into one of the largest pharmaceutical companies in Europe. He raised four kids and lived a relatively quiet life with pretty much anything he ever needed at his fingertips. Herr Merckle got his lederhosen in a twist due to the failing economy when he saw his net worth drop a couple billion dollars in the last year, leaving him with a paltry 7 or 8 billion. So he threw himself in front of a train and killed himself. Um... if you can afford to buy Manchester United, the New York Yankees and the Los Angeles Lakers and you still consider yourself to be a failure, you need to get a fucking hobby. A puppy would probably suffice too. This is the same backwards train of thinking that doomed Enron execs who were so bored with all their money they tried to measure their dicks by acquiring rare artwork and fast cars. Greed is good unless it robs you of all common sense and happiness. Loosen the tie and find new friends. Or find Jesus. But don't insult hard working people everywhere who are barely scraping by in this economic debacle by taking such a drastic action when you've had every luxury life could possibly afford you. Douchebag.

3 comments:

Randal Graves said...

I'm sad that the dude survived. No, wait, no I'm not because sure he'd be fucked up and possibly missing a limb or three, but his medical care would probably be on the German dime instead of the 7 or 8 billion he had left.

Randal Graves said...

didn't survive. Me get reedin comperhenson.

puddy said...

yeah... this one is a little strange. why would he off himself? big life insurance policy? wanted to protect him family from debt? maybe he was provided some assistance when stepping in front of that train? nihilist? either way, seeing as he was a 70-something year old man with the first name "adolf", i wont miss the son-of-a-nazi.

...and another dead rich guy... - and they say amurkins are too narcissistic for suicide...